Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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