Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
