Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize