Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
