No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Operation Purity has been aborted
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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