I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
