I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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