How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Randomize
