TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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