I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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