Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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