i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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