That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
