I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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