I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize