But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
this boner is exhausting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize