she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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