Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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