My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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