Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
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