I wish they made helmets for livers.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize