i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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