The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
