I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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