question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
