that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
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