How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
a bad idea.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder