guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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