My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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