Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
