called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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