well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
