So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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