If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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