when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
