mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
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for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
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so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties