This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize