I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
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