alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
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Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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