I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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