you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
