this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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