I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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