I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
