ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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