What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize
