Tell her she can't have a vagina
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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