He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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