Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
