smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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