Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
